An Adoptive Mother's Thoughts on "Embryo Adoption"
by Jane Nast
March - April 1998 Issue, Adoption Triad Forum

I'm one of those folks who, if I were 30 years younger, could have been in the market for an "embryo". At one point in our meager "fertility" treatments in the early 60's, we were offered artificial insemination - "mixing donor sperm and no one would know" the doctor told us. But we said "we would know, and we couldn't live a lie" and we decided that we wanted to be parents more than we wanted a "semi-genetic" offspring.

However, I know how desperate the feeling is for a child and I watch today's prospective parents almost with horror... at the money they spend for treatments and the lengths they will go to make a baby. The offering of a fertilized embryo to them is "the answer to their prayers": No one would ever know, and they won't have to go through the demeaning interviews to adopt... and wouldn't be threatened by the presence of a birth parent!

I believe that the American Adoption Congress (AAC) should take a stand on this issue because it is not going to go away... it's only going to get more sophisticated and easier. And it is the $$$ pot at the end of the rainbow for the fertility business.

If the public and legislators don't really understand the psychological side of regular adoption... how are they going to understand the psychological side of this? I hear the talk and the casualness with which this subject is treated, and I want to scream!. That embryo grows into a real human being, folks... don't you care?

We cannot stop the progress of this technique, so we ought to try to figure out a way to get their attention and educate them... it won't be easy. Perhaps we should educate the practitioners first - and not neglect the prospective parents - but when the ethical social workers realized the importance of records and knowing, they made a turn around... maybe we can make a few ethical doctors listen to us.

The author is an adoptive mother and president of the American Adoption Congress. She is also a legislative activist and a core group member of the New Jersey Coalition for Openness in Adoption.

Mar-Apr 1998

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Adoption Triad Forum
Editor: Alicia Lanier
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© 1998 The Creative Solution

Last updated October 22, 1999